It has been know in our African tradition that men ought to be the head in everything. This is coming to an end as equality is being introduced to us by our mothers and many girls have come to embrace this. The place of man is being replaced slowly by slowly. Where is this heading? Often times have we seen in news women fighting for their rights. We are ok with women being women in the society and taking their place not that of a man. A woman is supposed to be the body of a man while man stand as the head.
However, this does not mean can’t be a leader in the society, it doesn’t mean women should not be educated , it doesn’t mean that women should not work in higher positions! All these are good and we are not against it. When talking about a man being the head this means they will have to think and come up with ideas, have to see things, hear, smell, look beautiful and be beautiful for women. On the other hand, a woman is supposed to be the rest of the body. This is where the functionalities comes in.
As a woman, you will have to turn this head [vision] to where it is seeing, carry it, bear it, drive, build it, walk in it. Note that most of the functions are in the body and the head cannot do. And this means the head cannot accomplish its duty without the body and so does the body without the head. Women has a lot to do at the end of the day. They have to be strong and connected to the head. This means every woman has to have a man figure in his or her life. This could be a father, brother, uncle or even a husband.
The problems that we are having in the world today are caused by women who are not functioning as the body but the head which they are not. Check on a woman who want to be the head or rather equal with his husband and see where they end up. Their dreams are never accomplished because there is no one to do the work of the body. Woman should take her position in all areas. This is supposed to be passed to the young girls as they grow. Respect for men should remain.
Nevertheless, there are men who are leaving women to be the head and to take care of everything. This is a huge problem having men who do not understand their position. We can call this as a great cause of the equality campaign in the world today. Every boy should be taught to be a man from his tender age and by the end of the day we will be having peace in our world.
So, what are we saying? Equality will not solve any problems as many people think but add more trouble in our families and the society will be destroyed. All men and women need to know is their positions and function. Otherwise, families will never stand in this world.
It is very sorrowful that many girls face rejection before they are conceived in their mother’s womb. I have people discuss on how many children they would love to get once they get married but there is one thing which never lack in this topic. Would you like a boy or a girl as a firstborn? Definitely most people choose boys and it makes me wonder if people were the decision makers whether we will be having women in the society today. This already tells you that even before some girls were conceived their parent had already rejected them.
Another scenario comes in when both parents decide to get a child and they start wishing it would be a boy. Some men become so violent and change their character towards some children because of the gender. The worst thing which can happen is when a wife gives birth to girls without a boy. Upon the arrival of a girl child it is obvious some people do not rejoice like when a boy child is born. This becomes the beginning of rejection in life and it can affect the life of that girl from childhood until they are put under 6ft on the ground.
Women are always their own enemies.
With the technology in the world today any person can get to know the gender of a child when they are born which is good but it has come with very negative effect. This is in connection of what we are talking about. After conceiving some women under the guidance of men or themselves are aborting babies who are said to be girls. Some women confess with their lips that they would not like to have a girl child in their lives while others say that they do not want a girl as a firstborn. Surely, why then were they born? What if their parent aborted them when they were born?
Are girls really important?
One thing is that there was no other way of procreation except through woman and every person who has ever existed or is existing on the earth were brought down by a Now that God could not say let there be Stella or Elizabeth but He had to do it using a woman. They are the ones who give birth to boy child and help them grow, learn and make them to be the gentlemen who they are.
There is no man who can be successful without the help of a woman. This maybe their mother, aunty, grandmother, wife or women in the society. They are born teachers on how to live life. They do it with a passionate heart that is full of love. Apart from giving birth, a woman can be a provider to a family of 10 children a lone and so they have strength even to build a nation. Should we then continue rejecting this beautiful creature called woman??
People have to appreciate the role of a woman in the society but before that women must make peace with themselves. It just starts from within and if they can accept the fact that they are women and see how important they are then it would solve this. Men have also the biggest role to play here by taking care of women from their tender age and to treat them like mothers. Women are Important. We need them.
Originally posted on Virtuous Woman:
Some years back we could see an African Woman waking up early to go do her work which is to serve the husband and children. They could do a lot of work during the day such as cultivate land and still ensure that their children are schooling which the husband could spend the day watching over the livestock or…
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African Women have been known of being enslaved to their husband in everything. This has been a good culture to follow and live in and many men look for such women to marry. The word equality which I don’t know whether it was brought by the western world has brought a lot changes in that there is no submission anymore which is causing a lot of trouble in marriages. Many women ‘independent women’ has greatly influenced the world in this and it is not only in Africa but other nations.
Some years back we could see an African Woman waking up early to go do her work which is to serve the husband and children. They could do a lot of work during the day such as cultivate land and still ensure that their children are schooling which the husband could spend the day watching over the livestock or even doing nothing much. Some would even go to office work and come in the evening but still find that their homes are well managed by one woman. The women who used to do office work could also manage to leave work and still go cook, do cleaning among other chores and family work. This is very different compared to the live we are living today.
Also Read.. Traditional food- do we still need it?
It is not a surprise anymore to hear that a woman has refused to do house chores because she has been working during the day. The same thing happens that many men are doing women work and cooking for themselves because women have refused their work. Now you wonder whether we really have women or all of us have become men. This issue is causing a lot of separation and men are therefore going out with younger girls and even eating in restaurants. It is true this is not a kind of a society which we want to live in and so change is required.
Most of women say that they are tired and cannot even cook for the husband and leaving all the work to the house help. One of the reported causes is the food that we are eating and the whole issue of equality since there is women who say they have also been working the whole day just like men are doing. But the big question is; is the respect of the name ‘man’ fading away? Yes it is. There is no submission and this has as well resulted to a lot of divorce cases. On the other hand we can focus on the African Man and see whether he is still having such problem/. According to many women many men have not changed and they are still counted as the breadwinner and they are making it.
“With their efforts we can see potential into providing for the whole family in general especially when a women are playing their role well” this is one of the answers that I got when I was discussing with a colleague. I totally agree with him but still there are some men who have as well forgotten their duties. Once a man forgets his duties there is a high chance that the woman will raise up and take over the whole family thereby leaving the woman behind. This will not only affect the husband’s relationship with the wife but the father children relationship.
So, what can solve this? The name man has lost its value and it is higher time that it be taken as it used to. Let the respect remain and be taught to the children. Women should also do their family duties as required just like African Women used to do sometimes back. This will help in maintaining our African culture and the name virtuous women will be restored back to this beautiful continent. To wake up early in the morning, prepare your family for the day and to go to your work will make it all happen. And of course do it with love. The same happens in the evening when you areal back, do not be lazy woman! Be an African Woman- strong woman. Next time we are going to focus on African Men and see the changes they have embraced which are ruining marriages in Africa.
Women complain a lot about men and this is something that has resulted to family separation because women are yet to understand something about men. Talking about dirty mismanagement and laziness when it comes to home chores and how men left or display their clothing once the wife has arranged and such kind of things can make young marriages break so easily.
Men complain of doing washing, cooking and arranging their thing. When they get married they do it with a mind that the helper will be doing all such kind of things and it will never bother them. Now assuming that, they become irresponsible in that field and they don’t care about it any more. Supposed you have married a lady who has been seeing you being very neat and clean every time and they think it will remain the same when you stay together in that institution.
No all men are like that but there some things that they have in common and that is they don’t like doing house work. Women should understand that men can be very irresponsible in the house because they are expecting that you as a wife will do it. And if a man marries a woman who has this behavior, then one has to change or else quarrels will be every moment greetings.
When you think of the creation story, God created men from dust and dust is dirt. That is why men are connected to dust. While women were created from the flesh. Men will always have that mind of dirt in them and there is no change expected unless the woman brings it to them. There are parents who has taken care of their boys and they has become very responsible but they still have the same mind though that has added impact into their family life.
Men are made men by the women, what women instill in men’s life is what makes them the best husband and dad to that family and also to the nations leaders. If a man doesn’t get this from a woman, then the outcomes will be dirty. Understanding this will help you as a woman will be praised by the society because your family will reflect your personality. There is a saying that goes that all men are boys but not all boys who are men. If a woman plays her role in the marriage that boy will become a great man and men should also play their roles.
Some may say no while others may say yes. But it depends on what one believes but if one has experienced this can give an appropriate answer, and this came about when i met a friend who regrets on what she did. Just reminded me what a certain speaker said at a time i attended ladies meeting, that women have now changed and they want to do men work or duties. And this gives me a reason why my friend was regretting of being busy working for the family and the husband had told her not to over work because he could make the ends meet for his family but the wife said no, i have to work.
She could not create time for the husband because of work. And this was the cause of separation since the husband as you know how men are when disrespect or when they see like women/wives are not caring about them. He went on and married another lady who could afford all the time in the world for him.
The same thing happen to men who do not create time for their wives and children they always end up losing their family and mostly the respect they had. This is the greatest shame that a man can go through. And so we can be busy but we should be creating time for our families and this will make all of us proud. Let us be caring and live happily as we work hard.
This is a story given by a friend; I was walking down in the village and along the way I was thinking about this gal I was dating and she was cheating on me. She was always sending me SMS when time comes and I was busy she began to complain. When we were dating, her messages were …and this made me feel like she is the girl for my life, but one day I called her and she told me that she is married thinking it was a joke, she gave the husband the phone. I felt like I could never love again, but this was the beginning of the relationship which differs from one person to another and reasons for being in relationship differs, but this final destination is always one. Want to be loved, people want to receive and give a little bit of kit, this has made relationship to be taken as business. Does that sound like it’s not true? Okay lets narrow it to lovers’ relationship or boy, girl relationship. Ok you still want us to narrow it further. a relationship leading to marriage.
Many are the people whose marriage are in rocks or heated there because of the guidelines they were using.
Many ladies begin with a list of qualities. Likewise to my fellow men, but they have always forgotten that they don’t belong to themselves but they belong to their maker. For example, you cannot buy a saloon car and expect it to work of a pick-up. Every time we put characters as a guideline then we are hooked up with a wrong person.
It’s always good to let your maker to have a say in your life because you have a purpose to life for.
In the second point you must have good reasons why you want to be in relationship. If it is for fun, then when fun ends then the relationship end as there. If it’s to make children, when the business of making children gets to the end, then the relationship ends. If it is to have sex, then after sex you forget about your marriage and only remember you are married when you want to have sex. Ooh if you are in relationship for finances .ooh sorry because when money stop flowing the relationship stops flowing too. If you are marring a title, this title foe example lawyer will always be here but the partner will always be away.
What am driving at is that you have to let GOD in your life and in minor and major decisions of your life as you take time in your life in making decisions.
Friends there is a danger in engaging into a relationship for the wrong reasons .for you will always get hurt. Make a check list of what you want of relationship and if the big beneficiary in the relationship is you then you are going no where in that relationship. Love is giving out and it’s not a recipient so if you want to receive sorry you must give first and expect no return because this is an affair but not business. Go and make it ha happen. It is a principle you harvest what you planted.
I was talking to one of my friends and as we was conversing I can not remember where it all began but she promised to give me Gods way of calculating but it was amazing because it was 1+1=1 I did not stop there but I went back to the bible and I realized that the same formula is there and it was husbands. Love your wives as Christ loved the church, this turns to women submit to your husband. Dear readers if you add love and submission the result is unity when you love you should be ready to listen, care, fellowship and rejoice while submission is hard but it is easily achieved when you get determined. Submissions Commands love to grow. It can only work when the formula is followed to the dot. So there is no way out if one side is not performing its duty. Go try it out if the last result won’t be amazing.
I wish all the best in your relationship
Homes are started with a lot of love and affections supported by promises which give hopes and makes one to keep on going day in day out thinking of their spouse. Do we ask ourselves what really happens when people keep on being together ? They get their first born to the third born or even fifth and still love each other? Or do you ask yourself what happens that people who have been in love and have started it well are no longer together? This two status has been in many homes, many people do say maybe he or she was not the one created for me and many other thing.
There are things that makes homes to stand, first the love; maintaining that feeling you you both feel for each other makes it strong each day, respect and being submissive to your spouse as a wife keeps him coming or being near to you because he feels like a man who has the authority even if it is not outside there with other people but inside that house he is known to be the head., handwork as a couple without humiliating any side will keep your home standing despite what king of storm may attack you because is supported with love. Cleanliness even with no better clothes or a good house will reflect a good picture outside there and so it is very important for the mother/wife to put that in mind.
What makes many home to collapse is ; failure for the both not to maintain the kind of feeling they were feeling for each other, this is caused by disrespect, not accepting each other, arguments over small issues, lack of forgiveness, lack of money and not wanting any other party offering help like the parents and counselors.
When children come into the life of all couples it gives them the pride and this acts as one thing that can unity of separate them completely. One may parent may offer all love to the baby and forget there is/was my wife or there was/is my husband. But if both accept the present which is the baby and continue paying attention to each other all goes well.
Our children needs our time and we also do need our time and on other hand our parents say that we lost them and forget there were people like them, how about that? This happen to be a very disturbing factor in marital issues and it breaks many families. This is a matter of organizing yourself to avoid the words that comes out of our parents mouth, they can be cursing or blessing, their words has made many families broke up.
It is good to be a father and to be a father with your children calling your so and knowing that you are not a lone in the world but you someone to support or to support you.
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench
rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function and begins to talk.
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
WOMAN: “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”
WOMAN: “I’m at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It’s only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?”
MAN: “Sure, ..go ahead if you like it that much.”
WOMAN: “I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2010 models. I saw one I really liked.”
MAN: “How much?”
MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”
WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing . The house we wanted last year is back on the market. They’re asking $950,000.”
MAN: “Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer $900,000.”
WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see you later! I love you!”
MAN: “Bye, I love you, too.” The man hangs up.
The other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.
Then he smiles and asks: “Anyone know who this phone belongs to?”
A man wanted to get married. He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.
The first does a total makeover. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new makeup; buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5,000. She gives him back his $5,000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he’d given her. Then he married the one with the biggest tits.
From the beginning God created man with his own image, people really take it lightly but it means a lot, and if you violate this statement, dislikes a rises from men.men r the head of everything but not necessarily everything with a positive attributes. He needs respect from the whole family begining with the wife and to all visiters who may get in his house . For children to respect the father, mother has to start it and to show the kids he is the head of the family.
When a woman becomes so naging that bothers the husband and it can make a man furious to an extend of doing something awful.Lazy wives makes their husband to runaway from them, when a man gets home n finds there no food, everything is not in order and the wife is not in the house, he may try to look for some other ways. this show there are two heads in the house.
Dressing, talking and the way a woman presents herself before people can make the husband to leave for another or to stay with her. Dressing style goes on age, and the occasion that both are attending. Many women says that their mother in laws are bad but this depend on the kind of a person you show them you are by dressing and talking, this gives the husband honour to the family or shame. And no man likes this.
The children has to be brought up in a good ways and their picture outside and inside the house should represent the parents, this mostly should be done by both parents. It is their responsibility to make sure those kids are well fed, dressed, mannered and educated. Good behaviors are worth for the family and should be set while kids are still small. And that family will be honored and the wife of that family shall be called A Virtuous woman and the man an Honorable man.
Women are the backbone of any society yet they are always looked at as the weaker sex.
God have never used anything strong to change the world but He has always used the weakest of all. When Samuel was anointing David, All his brothers came and they had the strength that would been needed by Kenya armed forces or any other forces would have looked for the character that Davids brother had,but this was not the case with God. God look for different characters which we are mostly women kind of characters. for instance humble,submissive,loving, among others.
God was aware that man was the crude being but women were fine being . God had power to bring Jesus in another form of an already Big man but He made Him to be born by a woman to show the significance of a woman ion the society.
Women you are a pillar in our society a pillar that can not be ignored but all together you have left it in the hands of the devil claim it.
Men love this women as Jesus loved the church.Remember ,Jesus forgave the church and loved it with out revisiting the wrongs but always loving them.Love them unconditionally.
Women submissiveness melt the hard hearts, be submissive and do it for the glory of your Maker.
women!women!there are various reasons why women were created fro since time in memorial.as it dates back from history with different types of evidence ranging from religious to scientific evidence.obviously one of the major reason as to why a woman was created is that woman was created to offer companion ship to the man counter part.this is evidently from the bible when God created all things and at last he created man but it so seems the man was lonely and God create woman to keep the man away from loneliness.from a scientific view women are know to do more than one thing a time this give them a higher social responsibility being able to react to different stimuli at simultaneously giving them a upper hand in reacting to situations.from this perspective a woman is given a great role in society in terms of naturing and giving back to mother nature.
women are a sign of continuity in any environment.a society with a healthy women society has a high chance of success while the contrary is true.to add on women fulfill the natural cycle of growth.they bring up young ones in a more effective way that men do not.imagine a society without women how would the children be?lastly women are beautiful creation that the world has ever seen.yes they are and they make a world a better place.
But the question is can we get one of this men who is honorable and dependable in terms of family matters, and who is he if a description has to be made: An honorable man is the one who feels he a man and appreciates the fact that he is a man and has total respect to himself. Who is kind,polite hardworking and caring. This is seen by how he handle himself and cases to do with anything surrounding. I believe he is the kind of a person who everyone would like to be with in every situation because of his maturity.Note well that this has nothing to do with money like many would say but respect speaks for himself . And he will be call an Honorable man in every society.
According to what many ladies say about men it is impossible to get one, infact men are being referred to as animals, depending on how they treat everyone in the society, but this word came with just one or two people who maybe saw the side of animosity of men and they decided to call them so. This is something that has made many ladies fear men and marriage in their life.
Now we know that in every society if we can see some of the above qualities that describes who honorable man , he is in deed an honorable man.And yes honorable gentlemen can be found.
‘virtuousness’ is a virtue, it is what one practices,like how one can have a habit of doing something,what one does and says gives her a title not only to the husband and the family but to the society,
It starts when one is a small girl and it sometimes matters on how one was brought up,n/b not in terms of money but in terms of discipline. How one takes and says about herself affects the lifestyle of our “virtuousness”
Do you know how we dress matters a lot and can make you be respected or be despised in the society.This shows how you are and who you are. The other this is what comes out of your mouth, about you or about others always gives a portrait of you. This are some of the thiings that we do ignore and they affect our lifes negatively. Be positive always about yourself and about others. It is by our ways of doing things that we are known who we really are.
This is a question i asked some gentlemen and i got alot of answers describing who a virtuous woman is, some of the answers are below.
* First, there is creation. Adam was created first, then Eve. She was created to be his (Adam’s) helper.
* Second, there is the Fall. Eve was deceived, Adam was not. Because of this, Adam was to rule over Eve. (Gen. 3:16)
* A third reason for following the Biblical principles for headship is because it works! To be submissive to her husband does not mean a wife gives up her right to think or to be an individual or become less of a person.
The key to submission is that the Bible tells a wife to be submissive;
therefore she MUST do it.
(Submission is defined as yielding, surrendering, giving way to)
Jesus Christ is our example of perfect submission
and total dependence on God.
Most women think they’ll never attain what is laid down in Scripture. But, it’s like the Christian walk – if we look at those around us, we tend to get discouraged. We’re all at a different levels in our Christian walk. God sees you right where you are and that’s where you need to get up and get going from. When more light (knowledge) is given, more (faith) is required. We don’t get in bad shape over night, so we shouldn’t expect to fix everything overnight.
A woman is subject to her husband, but she can still go directly to God to ask anything she needs or desires and get it as quickly as if she were a man. God hears the prayers of a godly woman as quickly as he hears the prayers of a godly man. If the Lord Jesus Christ, God Himself, submitted to the authority of the Father, it is no shame or dishonor for a woman to be under authority.
Francis Gika who fears the lord.
What about how can you describe a virtuous woman?
The Bible says favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but where can a virtuous woman be found for her price is high far above?
A virtuous woman is one who
goodness, righteous, purity; conforming to standards of what is right and just and to approved codes of behavior; goodness implies inherent qualities of kindness, benevolence, and generosity are her qualities.
The virtuous woman is a woman of strength. Though the weaker vessel, she is made strong by wisdom, grace and fear of God. Perhaps one reason for the rarity of a virtuous woman is that she is seldom sought. Too often the search is made for accomplishments and external qualities rather than for godly internal worth.
If one has this qualities then she is a virtuous woman and the society needs you and if you don’t you can still made it to be a virtuous woman and change this generation. Be a virtuous woman.